I’m freaking out man, I’m freaking out.
Yes it’s blood!
OK! OK!, Fine?! I’ll just tell you what happened. I met Dan out the front of Starbucks.
Shut up! It’s not because we wanted to go there, just everyone knows where it is. At least until they open another one. And then everyone is gonna be like which fucking Starbucks man.
Anyway Dan, you know him, the tall guy from Belinda’s party. We jump in my car heading up to the hills to find that moonshine man everyone’s talking about. Just as I take that hard right up on the bluff this light hits me. Blinded me for a few seconds, lucky I didn’t lose it. Car would have probably rolled downhill and ended up right here in the bar.
So I look over at Dan as if to say what the fuck, you know. And he just looks back at me cool as anything and says why’d you stop? Like he hadn’t seen a thing. That’s when I heard the sound. Kind of like a buzz saw starting up. And a second later, Smash! Straight through the windshield comes this disc. Goes through Dan’s neck like butter. It was inches away from death man. Still a whole mess of blood.
What?! You don’t believe me?
I got the thing right here. Take a look. That look like anything you’ve ever seen before?
No way man! It came straight at us. It has a mind of its own. It was waiting for us. It has to be some kind of weird alien shit.
No! Where the hell would I get acid? I’m not tripping balls man.
It does kinda look like hubcap.
Hubcaps aka nave plates were first used on the Newton Reaction Carriage in 1680.